Saturday, December 24, 2011

"...and when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse..."

      As of today I have spent thirty days here in Savannah Georgia.... thirty days with my mother, sister, brother in law, nephew and niece, all in the same house. I really wasn't sure what to expect or how I'd react, but in all honesty it's been pretty great! I have never spent more than a week at most with the kids, Nathan and Kathryn. My mom and I haven't lived together since we first moved to Arizona, and I know the last time my sister and I lived together was before she left for college and I was seven. Just because I touched back down in the States and sought shelter with family, I was not yet home and still considered this all part of the adventure.  My mom and I have always been partners in crime...crimes of fun, and having me here gave her a great excuse to further discover her new exhibits, wildlife refuges, etc. Every day it seemed after she was done with work we were off doing or seeing something new. We even took a trip up to Charleston, and our old family vacation spot of Kiawah Island. And now that she's no longer in Arizona and she's back working again, "pop over" trips are less likely to happen, so this quality time with her has been a gift. Life in the house, family life, even though I was obviously part such a one many moons ago had me more than a little out of my element. I mean being an unmarried hippie artist sans kids, a "one woman wolf pack" if you will whose friends are mostly without kids, it's a bit of a culture shock. It was fascinating to watch as I tried wrap my brain around kids, school, jobs, conflicting schedules, dropping off, picking up, who's here for dinner, who eats what and when and see everyone maneuver all these obstacles with relative grace. In the beginning I felt like Jane Goodall or actually the more appropriate analogy would be the reverse... that I'm the gorilla studying Jane's family scratching my head in amazement. As a dancer I really admire the intricate and complicated choreography that is being a family. Admire? Yes. Emulate? Not so much, unless at some point I end falling for a guy with kids and love leaves me no choice. At this point, my natural tendency seems to be as a solo artist or happy duet.
It's also been a gift to truly get to know my nephew and niece; 12 and soon to be 11. I am not a kid person in general, but especially not a baby person so I LOVE this age! I am blessed that my sister has the mom gene and is doing all the dirty work so I just get to love on and impart my worldly rebel wisdom to 2 pretty cool kids! It's kind of crazy to be able to see several little similarities between them and me, my niece especially. While kind of crazy it really helps me understand them as people and hopefully is creating the kind of rapport that lets them know as they get older that they can always turn to Aunt Courtney.
Between her unrelenting work ethic and crazy hospital hours, my sister was the only person with whom I get didn't much time. It is still my hope that one day she will be able to take a long weekend and come to L.A with all the hippies and heathens for some long overdue sister fun! 
      The last three months have sharpened my adaptation and assimilation skills to a fine point so actually the month has flown. And I will be sad to say goodbye no doubt, but I must say that I am ready to head back to La La Land and be able to finally and completely UNPACK. Normally I would say that I'm ready to go home, but recently L.A is not exactly feeling like home. I am going back with a very unsettled and uncertain feeling. That could easily be because I've been gone for four months, experienced and changed a lot, etc. It could also be because of having the seed planted in my mind that I may have to move shortly should my landlords decide to take it back for their family. I don't know who's life is waiting for me back there. I guess I'll find out in 3 days. Even my cat, Zoe has apparently fallen in love with the new guy staying with her. 
    I am however fairly certain I found a job, I have a finalizing meeting scheduled for January 4th, so I know I will at least be able to pay my rent. I contacted RealRyder International (the company that makes the bikes in the cycling studio I was previously working for) and they had an opening for an office manager at their Santa Monica headquarters. Since it is not a studio, I will not be getting up at 4:30 in the morning but rather will hold the more tolerable hours of 8-4. For my own sanity I needed to make that tweak so I wouldn't feel the oppression of saying I work 9-5 and also so I would still be able to make my yoga and dance classes in the evening. It's obviously not my dream job, but one needs a job that affords them to continue to pursue their dream career. Or in my case, careers. As I said in my very first entry, I have several fires in my belly; writing, photography, dancing, acting, and collage art. When people ask me now what I do, I will say in all confidence... I am an artist, all encompassing. 

     I wish you all a very Happy Solstice, Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanza, Festivus... and New Year! I will be back in L.A by the 28th.... so if you see someone that looks like me painting the town red on New Year's Eve, tis not a mirage ;-)